So, recently an awesome friend who we’ll call X in case she doesn’t wanna be included in my shenanigans pet say for us. She does way too much, buying us household items and cleaning and whatnot. I found a bottle of liquid fabric softener, apparently left by her and had no idea what to do with it. It’s been hanging around for a couple weeks now, so finally I texted her, in an attempt to find it a home or a use and the conversation goes like this…


Me: Do u use liquid softener?? Like would u use this liquid fabric softener?? Idk how to do liquid… I barely know how to do laundry… [Knowing she probably won’t because she has those HE machines.]

X: Haha you just pour it in the thing in the middle.

Me: ?? Before I start load ???

X: Yes

Me: I can’t see how… Middly thingy’s supposed to open somehow??? I cant do it

X: LOL, you may have a separate dispenser

Me: Oh jeez… I’m so confused.

X: [Sends pic of dispenser on her washer thingy.]

Me: I found it! But it says bleach.

X: Then you need to do it old fashioned way sooo forget about it! You’d have to wait and watch for rinse cycle to start and pour it in then.

Me: [Meanwhile I think I’ve figured out how to remove top off middle thingy and send her a pic to see if this is right] saying “aha! got middle open… put it in there???

X: Yes in there! Put half cap full in! Yea!

Me: Ohhhh. Cool. Thanks!!!!!

Me: Wait – can I just fill it up to use as needed like JetDry???

X: Nooo, have to do per load.

Me: Oh. Hmmmmm. I must try this…

X: It releases on rinse cycle. You’d have to rewash your clothes 100 times to get all that softener if you filled it! LOL

Me: [sufficiently scared off experiments] Ew. Rewashing bad. Ookkayyyy.


Yea… I dont know anything! 

X: My Mom said if you never use bleach you can put it in that one.

Me: Ohhhh cool. How do you people know these things???